I really wish I had started doing thoughts on the films earlier, but it's been a bit of a crazy month and my internet access at home has been spotty at best. As such, I'll keep most of these brief.
BLAIR WITCH(Adam Wingard, 2016)
16 years after the last installment in the franchise, this sequel is told in the "found footage" method that the (in)famous first installment utilized. The underrated second film was a traditional narrative. The film shows Heather's brother and a group of friends venturing in to the Maryland woods to see if they can find any further evidence of what happened to his sister. I've long been a person who mocked people who said they get motion sickness from the filming method, but I had a bad headache and felt queasy during the first half of this. I was praying for a static shot and when they did come it was all too brief. At least Book of Shadows had a cool twist on the premise, while this is just a standard retread. When it works, it definitely works and there are some creepy sequences. The glimpses of the witch work well. Acting is fine, sound design is terrific. GRADE: B-
CELL
(Tod Williams, 2016)
A signal coming through cell phones causes society to turn into a zombie horde, with the exception of a few outsiders who must make their way through an apocalyptic world. The survivors-band-together-in-a-post-apocalypse-world is one of my fave horror subgenres, and while that element of this film works okay, the zombie aspect falls flat on its face. Sometimes laughable, even if it is a relatively creative idea for a zombie outting. John Cusack, Samuel L, Jackson and Isabelle Furhman star in this Stephen King adaptation. GRADE: C
THE CONJURING 2
(James Wan, 2016)
Disappointing followup that finds the Warrens heading to London to investigate a haunting. Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson remain a formidable pairing, but the family they are investigating is just so bland and the film feels a little too fantastical. The first film, despite some unbelievable moments, felt grounded in reality which is what really made it work. The demon nun would've worked really well in an Insidious film. Beefy Patrick was probably my favorite part of this. Everytime I see him, I feel insanely jealous of that time Kate Winslet got to smack his ass in Little Children. GRADE: C+
THE DARKNESS
(Greg McLean, 2016)
Thoroughly bland and sedate haunting film that has two elements that could've worked: the Native American haunting and the son being autistic. Instead, the film safely keeps both elements at bay. Perhaps the filmmakers were worried about offending people? Kevin Bacon and Radha Mitchell star as parents who return from a family trip to the Grand Canyon with more than just memories. This one is especially disappointing given how potent McLean's previous films have been. GRADE: C
DON'T BREATHE
(Fede Alvarez, 2016)
Sort of a reverse Wait Until Dark, three young robbers break into the home of a blind man to steal a large sum of money and get more than they bargained for. Intense, with terrific directing, cinematography and sound. Alvarez continues to impress, and if he and Jane Levy keep teaming up every few years for a new horror film, I will remain a happy fan. Stephen Lang is a great villain. I do wish the film's black and white, silent sequence had gone on longer and had not been aided by the score. That would have ramped up the tension even more. GRADE: B+
A HORRIBLE WAY TO DIE
(Adam Wingard, 2010)
If I complained about Wingard's shakey cam in Blair Witch, wait til you hear me go off about this! A very low budget film about an escaped serial killer slaughtering his way back to his ex-girlfriend. Half the scenes seem to end with the camera just pulling away from a close-up, going blurry, and then dropping altogether. Thank God Wingard has improved and I'll blame Blair Witch's camera work on the found footage aspect. More stuff like The Guest, please? Low budgets often add to the charm of many films in this genre, but here it just distracts. Mumblecore faves Amy Seimetz, AJ Bowen and Joe Swanberg star. GRADE: D+
HOWL
(Paul Hyett, 2015)
A group of strangers have to fend off a horde of werewolves after their train breaks down in the middle of the wilderness. This had potential, but a lot of the characters were obnoxious and the werewolf effects were lackluster and generic. Cutie Ed Speelers and The Descent's Shauna MacDonald star. GRADE: C
THE HUNGER
(Tony Scott, 1983)
Sexy vampires David Bowie and Catherine Deneuve seduce a doctor (Susan Sarandon) after their centuries-long love affair begins to wane. I was never a huge fan of Tony Scott, but I think this may be the film of his I liked most. Sexy, stylish, engaging performances and a surprisingly potent scary ending. GRADE: B+
MISS PEREGRINE'S HOME FOR PECULIAR CHILDREN
(Tim Burton, 2016)
Eva Green stars as the caregiver of a group of children with special powers during World War II. It's not as stylistically overdone as much of Burton's recent output (and it doesn't have Johnny Depp!) but it's too long and never quite engages the way it should. It doesn't help that the young adult/fantasy genre might have already overstayed its welcome. Asa Butterfield and Samuel L. Jackson (one of the only actors of color cast in a major role in a Burton film) also star. GRADE: C
THE NEON DEMON
(Nicolas Winding Refn, 2016)
A mysterious young woman (Elle Fanning) begins her career as a model in a dangerous and deadly world that might just literally eat her alive. I was initially higher on this while watching it, but my opinion of it has dropped significantly since the viewing. It's stylish and at times jaw dropping, but it never breaks out of a "pretty/bloody fashion spread". The too-on-the-nose satire and intentionally campy moments don't work at all. Fanning sure is game and has the perfect look, and Keanu Reeves and Christina Hendricks briefly show up in potent cameos. Refn really needs to be told "No!" by someone and fast. GRADE: C
NIGHTBREED
(Clive Barker, 1990)
Craig Sheffer plays a troubled young man who after drying is drawn to a place called Midian where a bunch of monsters and demons hope to get revenge on the living. I love the idea of this oddball group being anti-heroes and the villains being alive. This film has spectacular makeup work and production design, but the climax is so sloppily edited and all over the place. After researching the film, I found out that the studio interfered with Barker's version and released a botched cut. The director's cut is now available and I might have to watch that in the future. Legendary director David Cronenberg also appears. GRADE: B
THE PACK
(Nick Robertson, 2016)
Aussie thriller about a family stranded on their property (which they might lose thanks to tough times) with a pack of ravenous dogs. Like The Shallows (see below), it rings maximum suspense from a simple premise and a tight running time. Also, the dad (Jack Campbell) in this is fucking hot. Mmm, oh Aussie men, you fellows know how to do it. I wish the film had a slightly better score, though I liked that the dogs are just blood-thirsty for no real reason. GRADE: B
SALEM'S LOT
(Tobe Hooper, 1979)
Three-hour miniseries based on Stephen King's novel in which a writer returns to the small Maine town of Salem's Lot amid a scourge of vampire killings. The first part is rather slow and should have been edited down. Like many of King's miniseries, this really did not need to be as long as it was. The second part is much better and has some solid moments. This was remade as a TNT miniseries in 2004 but I never saw that. I wish someone would make a feature version that has an appropriate running time. David Soul, Lance Kerwin and Bonnie Bedelia star. Look for a young Fred Willard! GRADE: C+
THE SHALLOWS
(Jaume Collet-Serra, 2016)
Blake Lively stars as a surfer stranded on a rock with a man-eating shark stalking her every move. Silly, solid B-movie, and exactly the type that Hollywood needs to focus on making more of: a modestly budgeted pic with a simple premise built around a star (or, in this case, Blake Lively). Collet-Serrra has become a master of this type of film and why he isn't booked solid for the next decade shows how stupid Hollywood sometimes is. GRADE: B+
TEEN WOLF
(Rod Daniel, 1985)
So..this probably wasn't the best comedy to watch for Horrorfest. As mentioned numerous times, I've been looking for some non-horror Halloween-ish movies to watch. This turned out to be not the type of film I was searching for. For starters, it does very little with the werewolf story aspect. He plays basketball, then he turns into a werewolf because of a family curse. And that's it. Very little other werewolf iconography. Disappointing. Michael J. Fox's natural charisma shines through, so much that it's sort of hard to believe he wasn't a more popular guy prior to his transformation. And for a comedy, this movie isn't particularly funny. I'm kind of surprised this movie is as popular as it is. Maybe I should just watch the TV show? GRADE: C
ETA: This is being added almost a year later. There were several additional movies I watched that I didn't review. I guess my life was really crazy last year or something.
The Crow - B+
The House by the Cemetary - B
The Purge: Election Year - B
And a 20th Anniversary rewatch of...
The Craft - B+
And the following Friday, I watched...
Carnage Park - C+
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