Horrorfest: The Rest of the Fest

THE CANAL
(Ivan Kavanagh, 2014)
A film archivist finds his new home in footage from a crime scene that occurred a century earlier. I was let down by this because I had heard some good things, but it didn't seem to have its own voice and was only an amalgam of several (better) films. The ending seemed to be a little bit of a cop out. If you're looking for horror films revolving around tunnels, Absentia is much better. Rupert Evans, an actor I've had a crush on for over a decade, is good as the lead. He oddly doesn't seem to work in mainstream projects anymore. I just watched this 2 days ago and have already forgotten most of it, so that's not good. GRADE: C

DARK WAS THE NIGHT
(Jack Heller, 2015)
This was a little frustrating because there's a very good horror film in here somewhere. A small town sheriff must fend off a monster that is killing off people and animals at night. The problem is that the first hour is comprised almost entirely of a 5-10 minute scene explaining what happened the night before, followed by a minute of suspense. By the time the film gets to its climax, the up and down nature of the narrative has sucked out most of the suspense. The film does manage to capture a mode, so I wouldn't be surprised if the filmmaker puts out something good at some point. It also wisely keeps the creature offscreen for most of the runtime. Kevin Durand - a very reliable character actor - acquits himself nicely in the lead role. He pulls off the backwoods sheriff look nicely. Also with Lukas Haas (still looking like he's a teenager) and Nick Damici (a modern day genre fave). GRADE: C

THE HOUSES OCTOBER BUILT
(Bobby Roe, 2014)

A documentary crew, err...well, I'm not sure what they were? A group of friends with access to a lot of modern video recording technology go on a RV tour of famous haunted attractions, ultimately looking for an underground one that holds more in store than they bargained for. I think there's an interesting film to be made about these places, as the film hints on the fact that many labor laws are violated in the name of scaring the crap out of people. Many locations also hire ex-cons and sexual predators. There's also the socio-economic aspect of it, too. Obviously, this is just a silly horror film but that's not a bad idea for a film. Some elements of this work, but it's anti-climatic and the horror aspect isn't as good as the haunted house travelogue. GRADE: C+

POLTERGEIST
(Gil Kenan, 2015)
Shock of all shocks, I enjoyed this. Maybe it's because I love Sam Rockwell and Rosemarie DeWitt so much I just want to watch them for 90 minutes? Remake of the 80's classic centering around a family that moves into a new home situated on an old burial ground that may have been tampered with. Modern touches (like the tinkering with electronics) are added but it still retains most of what made the original work. Truth be told, I haven't seen the original since I was, like, 13 and I remember not caring for it. Another nice touch: the kids are actually tolerable and decent actors. I did also like how this incorporated the current economic climate. Jane Adams and Jared Hess co-star as the ghost hunters.
GRADE: B

PRESERVATION
(Christopher Denham, 2014)
Another horror film in the great outdoors, following  my recent viewing of Backcountry. This one focuses on a man, his wife and his brother going on a hunting and hiking trip in the woods only to have to fend off a trip of masked murderers. Basically, it's Deliverance meets The Strangers only nowhere near as good as either. Some suspenseful moments and decent performances, but like Backcountry it's a little too stylized for its own good. Why can't horror just be stripped down anymore? The best part about this was Orange Is the New Black's Pablo "Pornstache" Schreiber as the soldier brother suffering from PTSD. He was, like, ungodly hot in this. Yum. GRADE: B-

Hey, I kind of went this entire horrorfest without bitching about no video stores....

Until now.

I'm a little frustrated by my choices this year. Yes, I'm aware they are the films I chose to watch and some were decent. However, numerous older films I still have not seen are now not available on Netflix. I don't have access to other streaming sites, though hopefully next year I'll have a subscription to Shudder as that would be integral to the success of my annual tradition. This is where video stores would really come in handy. Teen Wolf, which I made a point last year in saying I would watch this year, is not available on Netflix. The original The Town That Dreaded Sundown is not available. (The remake is, and being a purist I can't watch that first). Maximum Overdrive or Graveyard Shift? Nope. Ravenous? Available on streaming, not physical. Jeesh.

As a result, I'm left with mostly recent films, many of which bypassed theaters after playing on the horror festival circuit. I also didn't get a chance to watch some of the blindspots in Wes Craven's filmography. That was my choice, because it'll be a sad day when I have no new Wes Craven movies to watch.

Anyways, The Final Girls rather stupidly comes to DVD/Blu on Tuesday, so I'll probably review that next week when I get the chance to watch it.

Box: Sandra's Brand Might Be Crisis

1. Our Brand Is Crisis - $11m / $11m / $32m
2. Goosebumps - $10.5m / $57.5m / $80m
3. The Martian - $10m / $181.5m / $208m
4. Bridge of Spies - $8m / $45m / $70m
5. Burnt - $7m / $7m / $20m
6. Hotel Transylvania 2 - $6m / $156m / $170m
7. The Last Witch Hunter - $5.5m / $19.5m / $30m
8. Steve Jobs - $4.5m / $16.5m / $30m
9. Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - $3.5m / $13.5m / $20m
10. Crimson Peak - $3m / $27.5m / $33m
**The Intern - $2.5m / $68.5m / $73m
**Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse - $2.5m / $2.5m / $6m

A very dead weekend before next week's behemoth. Our Brand is apparently tracking even lower than that, and will probably be one of the few missteps for Bullock recently. Burnt has been overcooked (har har) by Weinstein, so it's lucky it's even making it to theaters. The big story from last week was how poorly Steve Jobs did in its expansion. Lots of media articles being written could translate to a big drop, as the media declaring a film a bomb has never been overcome by good word of mouth or good reviews. Jobs doing so poorly has taken the spotlight off how badly Last Witch Hunter did. Scouts Guide is getting the same treatment Paranormal got last weekend, so it won't make the top 10. (Much like last week's Rock the Kasbah and Jem and the Holograms, which both somehow did even worse than anticipated.) Truth is also getting a semi-wide expansion, but I'd be surprised if it even tops $1m for this weekend given how poorly its done in limited.

Horrorfest: Starring Tom Hiddleston's Ass.

BACKCOUNTRY
(Adam MacDonald, 2015)
A young couple goes camping in the Canadian wilderness and comes face to face with a bloodthirsty black bear. A realistic horror film, it's sort of like last year's Willow Creek in that there's some tension that grows steadily between the pair and there's a lot of terror to be had in a tent. Claustrophobic direction alternately helps and hinders the film's effectiveness. Likewise, the cinematography is a little too lush and there's too much shakey cam and blurring going on. A grittier, less showy approach would have been more suitable. That said, there's still a lot of suspense. Missy Peregrym (Stick It!) and Jeff Roop star. GRADE: B

CRIMSON PEAK
(Guillermo del Toro, 2015)

After her father's death, a young woman moves into a rundown mansion in the middle of the British countryside with her new husband and his creepy sister. Big budgeted, old fashioned and stylish as can be! I'm hearing most people are disappointed this isn't the big horror film it was marketed to be, rather it's a gothic romance with ghosts and a bloody final act. (Not liking a film because it was different than what it was marketed to be is dumb.) I'm glad we live in a world where del Toro gets money to make something like this. I'd say in 10 years or so people will probably consider this a classic. If there's a major flaw it's that the actors are a little bland in their respective parts, though Jessica Chastain in the last act is pretty terrific. Mia Wasikowska, Tom Hiddleston and Charlie Hunnam star. GRADE: B+


DARK PLACES
(Gilles Paquet-Brenner, 2015)
Adaptation of Gillian Flynn's novel about a woman forced to reexamine what happened 30 years prior when her mother and several others were murdered in their Kansas farm house. Oooh boy, this is a mess. There's like four different movies happening here, and only one of them is of any interest. Of course, that's the one that the film spends the least amount of time with. Charlize Theron is given almost nothing to do other than assert to everyone how tough she is, while Nicholas Hoult makes puppy dog eyes at her. (Yeah, this union fared much better in Mad Max: Fury Road.) The plotline about the group that is obsessed with real life murders is the one that should have been at the forefront. Christina Hendricks, Chloe Grace Moretz and Corey Stoll co-star. GRADE: D+

MAGGIE
(Henry Hobson, 2015)

Arnold Schwarzenegger stars as a man in the post apocalyptic Midwest dealing with his daughter's infection, an infection that will slowly turn her into a zombie. Arnold is very understated in this bleak and morose drama, quite a departure from what we're used to seeing him play. Abigail Breslin is good as the soon-to-be undead girl, and there's a nice scene where she hangs out with her friends that felt more authentic and emotional than anything in The Fault In Our Stars in its depiction of teens nearing the end of their young lives. The film's monochromatic look is a giant cliche by now. Despite aiming for a more dramatic, less suspenseful tone, the film doesn't seem concerned about the fact that zombies are still roaming the planet. GRADE: C+



PUMPKINHEAD
(Stan Winston, 1989)
One of the only features to be directed by Winston, an Oscar-winning makeup and special effects artist who worked on everything from The Terminator to Aliens to Jurassic Park. Lance Henriksen stars a southern man whose son is accidentally killed by a group of hell-raising teenagers. With the help of a local witch, he unleashes a demon called Pumpkinhead to seek vengeance. This doesn't really turn into a horror movie until the last act and it's rare to see a movie from this generation that takes its time to build up to a bloodbath. I'm kind of surprised this hasn't been remade, but there are several sequels. There's very little joy in this film, even if its an entirely watchable entry in the late 80's horror era. GRADE: B-


STARRY EYES
(Kevin Kolsh and Dennis Widmyer, 2014)
An actress may have found the breakthrough role she's been waiting for, but it comes at a steep price. Indie horror film combines witchcraft/the occult, slasher and body possession for a shrewd take on the "price of fame" or "star is born" subgenre. Actress Alex Essoe is very good as the lead, and I suspect for both her and the filmmakers that their work here will lead to bigger - though not necessarily better - things. I'm not sure I like the film turning into standard slasher fare as I wish it had kept with the creepy occult and expanded on that aspect of the storyline. Nonetheless, this is a good film that deserves to find a cult following. Noah Segan and Pat Healy also appear. GRADE: B

Trailer: The Boy

This might have just enough of a fun twist to separate itself from the Killer Doll Genre. STX worked its magic at the end of this past summer turning The Gift into a word of mouth hit. And with The Walking Dead's Lauren Cohan in the lead, this could do decently at the box-office.

Ricky Gervais To Return As Host of the Golden Globes

Well, okay.

Variety confirms that Gervais is returning to host the Golden Globes for a fourth time.

After Chris Rock was announced as host of the Oscars, I figured it wouldn't be too long before the Globes announced their host. I was hoping they had someone, uh, new in mind. I'm guessing because of the high bar set by Amy and Tina they had difficulties finding someone.

Trailer: Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

A few weeks ago I posted the international teaser trailer for this, and now I'm posting the full American trailer. The contrast between the two is staggering. Everything the teaser got right, this gets completely wrong. I hope the international one is far closer to the tone. The domestic trailer takes itself way too seriously and looks more in line with the mediocre Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. Hmph.

Gotham Independent Film Award Nominations

I swear these used to be announced in November, but award season gets earlier and earlier every year. The awards will be handed out November 30th.

Best Feature:
Carol
The Diary of a Teenage Girl
Heaven Knows What
Spotlight
Tangerine

Best Documentary:
Approaching the Elephant
Cartel Land
Heart of a Dog
Listen To Me Marlon
The Look of Silence

Bingham Ray Breakthrough Director Award:
Desiree Akhavan - Appropriate Behavior
Jonas Carpignano - Mediterranea
Marielle Heller - Diary of a Teenage Girl
John Magary - The Mend
Josh Mond - James White

Best Screenplay:
Carol
The Diary of a Teenage Girl
Love and Mercy
Spotlight
While We're Young

Best Actor:
Christopher Abbott - James White
Kevin Corrigan - Results
Paul Dano - Love and Mercy
Peter Sarsgaard - Experimenter
Michael Shannon - 99 Homes

Best Actress:
Cate Blanchett - Carol
Blythe Danner - I'll See You In My Dreams
Brie Larson - Room
Bel Powley - Diary of a Teenage Girl
Lily Tomlin - Grandma
Kristen Wiig - Welcome To Me

Breakthrough Actor:
Rory Culkin - Gabriel
Arielle Holmes - Heaven Knows What
Lola Kirke - Mistress America
Kitana Kiki Rodriguez - Tangerine
Mya Taylor - Tangerine

Special Gotham Jury Award - The Ensemble Cast of Spotlight


Thoughts: Spotlight, Carol and Brie Larson begin their runs. There seems to be a lot of buzz around Love and Mercy and Paul Dano's performance in it. I wonder how far that film can go. So happy to see Blythe and Lily here. I hope they go all the way to the Oscars.

Horrorfest: What I Do In October

THE ENTITY
(Sidney J. Furie, 1982)
Barbara Hershey stars as a woman repeatedly being sexually assaulted by an unknown force in her LA home. Interestingly, this is one of the few films I can recall that ever combined hauntings with rape. (Well, I think Scary Movie 2 did, but we'll leave that alone.) The scenes of her breasts being fondled are - from a visual effects perspective - very well done and realistic. The Entity probably runs about 15-20 minutes too long, but overall it works. Something cool I noticed is that the score when the attacks happened was used by Tarantino in Inglourious Basterds. GRADE: B

INSIDIOUS: CHAPTER 3
(Leigh Whannell, 2015)
Barbara Hershey-less prequel to the Insidious films, which depicts how Elise (Lin Shaye), a former psychic, revives her gift to help a family make contact with their dead mother. Of course, something else comes back. I loved the first installment in this franchise and absolutely hated the second. The third falls in the middle. It's thoroughly mediocre, but Shaye is always enjoyable and it was fun to see how she got together with her assistants. The first two films had a distinct aesthetic that is sorely missed here. GRADE: C

SINISTER 2
(Ciaran Foy, 2015)
It's also a Barbara Hershey-less sequel. (Last time, I promise.) Ethan Hawke-less sequel (more of a spinoff, really) that follows the character from the first film named Detective So & So (yes, that's actually correct!) as her becomes entangled with a woman and her two sons on the run from her abusive husband. The sons are seeing the ghosts of the kids from the first film, and being urged to murder murder MURDER! James Ransone plays the detective. He's an actor I usually like, but his performance here is so tone deaf. This feels a lot more like a Children of the Corn sequel, than a Sinister one. I'm not the biggest fan of that film, but it had some elements that worked. There is a doozy of a death/gore scene in here that was pretty amazing. It involves rats and apparently was actually a medieval torture method. Other than that, it's entirely skippable. Shannyn Sossamon (remember her) also appears. And as far as hot pieces of horror ass go, the actor playing the ex-hubby (named Lea Coco) worked for me. GRADE: C

WE ARE STILL HERE
(Ted Geoghegan, 2015)
This is a good for a watch because I think the director has a lot of promise. The film follows the parents of a recently deceased college student who move to a new home with strange noises, a malevolent history and creepy neighbors. As first, it seems like an old fashioned haunting movie, but things turn deliriously violent in the final act. Some of it is derivative of The Fog and several other movies. There's a few too many plot holes and the acting ranges from decent to bad, but it does capture a mode. I also LOVED the last moment in the film. Genre fave Barbara Crampton stars. In fact, it's the rare horror movie with a cast of mostly older actors. GRADE: B-

WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS
(Jemaine Clement & Taika Waititi, 2015)
YES! A BROAD COMEDY! THANK YOU! More like this, please. Mockumentary following a clan of vampires trying to live and love and murder in the modern world. It's not a great film, and even at just under 90 minutes it feels a little long. However, the stuff that works really works. The cast (led by Jemaine from Flight of the Conchords) is razor sharp, and there are some serious laughs. A line early in the film comparing drinking a virgin's blood to a sandwich almost made me fall on the floor. It's all very slight, but I'm grateful for a horror-themed laugh out loud comedy. The werewolves would make a great spinoff. *hint hint* GRADE: B

Trailer: Joy

What? Did you think I was going to give any thought to the Star Wars trailer?

Here's the second trailer for David O. Russell and Jennifer Lawrence's third collaboration. If Brie Larson proves to be too obscure of a name to win Best Actress, J. Law could take home her second Best Actress trophy.

Box: Jeremy Renner did it first, Vin.

1. The Last Witch Hunter - $16m / $16m / $45m
2. Steve Jobs - $15m / $17.5m / $70m
3. Goosebumps - $13m / $41.5m / $74m
4. The Martian - $12.5m / $163m / $200m
5. Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - $12m / $12m / $26m
6. Bridge of Spies - $10m / $31.5m / $65m
7. Hotel Transylvania 2 - $7.5m / $147m / $170m
8. Crimson Peek - $5.5m / $22.5m / $35m
9. The Intern - $3.5m / $64.5m / $71m
10. Jem and the Holograms - $3m / $3m / $7m
***Rock the Kasbah - $3m / $3m / $8m

5 openers this weekend, and two might struggle in making the top 10. The battle for #1 is between Last Witch Hunter and Steve Jobs. Vin has done well with that car franchise, but remains an uncertain draw outside of it. (The last Riddick movie went nowhere, and I'm not sure what he's even done other than that.) Steve Jobs did very well its first weekend in limited release, but last weekend it's gross was lower than Sicario when it expanded to a similar number of theaters. It should do fine, though. Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension is being underbooked, due to Paramount planning an early VOD release. If it had a 3000+ theater count, it probably could have been #1. Jem and the Holograms and Rock the Kasbah have minimal advertising and mostly bad reviews. It'd be a shock if either made more than $5m.

Chris Rock Is Hosting The Oscars

Chris Rock will return as host of the Oscars. He previously hosted in 2005 at the 77th Academy Awards. His first hosting job wasn't that well received. The most memorable bit may have been unintentional when Chris made a few jokes about Jude Law being in every movie. Later in the show, Sean Penn, being the typical sour puss he is, called Rock out on the joke and praised Law for being one of the finest actors. Sadly, that overshadowed some of Rock's better jokes from the night. Rock returned to present in 2012 at the 84th ceremony, and delivered some great material about black actors only being allowed to voice animals in animated feature. If he sticks to that kind of material, he'll be a much better host than several of the people who have recently hosted. Not that that is a hard achievement. Hosting the Oscars is a tough job, but Rock is coming back with some experience and that will help.

I'm holding out the Globes will announce Amy Schumer as their host in due time. I get the feeling it'll be Seth Meyers who gets that job, though.

Box: I'll take the Backroad of Espionage, the Bridge of Spies is always too crowded.

1. Goosebumps - $27m / $27m / $90m
2. The Martian - $20.5m / $143m / $200m
3. Bridge of Spies - $19m / $19m / $75m
4. Crimson Peak - $18m / $18m / $50m
5. Hotel Transylvania 2 - $11m / $135m / $165m
6. Pan - $7m / $27m / $42m
7. The Intern - $5m / $58m / $71m
8. Sicario - $4.5m / $34.5m / $45m
9. The Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials - $3m / $75.5m / $82m
10. Woodlawn - $2.5m / $2.5m / $6m

Four openers, and they are hard to pin down. Goosebumps seems the easiest, as its social media presence is pointing toward an opening in the high 20's. Possibly higher if families are tired of Hotel Transylvania 2. (The kid in me is sooooo happy that both family films in release are Halloween-themed.) Bridge of Spies seems like Captain Phillips-lite, as far as box-office. But, Spielberg+Hanks could go bigger. I think the film looks a little too bland, and the adult market is JAM PACKED right now. Arriving for Halloween is the long anticipated Crimson Peak. At least among cinephiles. I'm not sure how mainstream horror audiences will warm up to such a stylish throwback. The only thing I can compare it to is The Woman In Black, but that at least had Daniel Radcliffe and a PG-13 rating. A month ago, I would have said Crimson easily takes this weekend. Lastly, I'm guessing Woodlawn is a religious-themed film so it's very hard to predict. Pan was a huge bomb last weekend (really, why did anyone think $150m on this was a good idea?) while The Walk isn't even going to make $15m total. All sorts of reasons for that film's failure. Steve Jobs had the highest PTA for a 2015 release last week and expands to 60+ theaters. If it makes the top 10 this week, that would be a great sign of things to come for it. This week, Room and Truth open in NY & LA with plans to expand over the coming weeks. Room is the one to keep your eyes on.

Trailer: "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies"

International trailer for the latest adaptation of Jane Austen's classic, this time with zombies. This trailer is perfectly done and does a great job of selling the concept. Probably my favorite teaser trailer in years. I'm stoked.

Horrorfest 6: Even Festier

A little late getting these on here, but here goes:

THE LAZARUS EFFECT
(David Gelb, 2015)
Cross between Flatliners and Pet Semetary. Olivia Wilde and Mark Duplass play a couple trying to bring the dead back to life. An experiment on a dog works, but their research is shut down once the university they work for discovers what they're doing. So, as horror plotlines go, Wilde dies and is brought back to life. Of course, she doesn't come back "normal". This is a good setup for a horror film, but the film's second half has way too many cliches of modern horror (flashy jump cuts, overpowering soundtrack) and isn't scary at all. Sarah Bolger, Evan Peters and Donald Glover round out the hip cast. GRADE: C-

THE GREEN INFERNO
(Eli Roth, 2015)
Oh, Eli Roth. When will you grow? We get it - you love Cannibal Holocaust. The horror director's latest tracks a group of privileged college student activists as they go to the amazon (captured in some very cheap and overly saturated digital photography)
to save a swath of it that is being threatened by bulldozers. Their plane ends up crashing right into the heart of a tribe of cannibals. There's one really great, stomach turning set piece, but the rest is surprisingly tame given the director's track record. What is present is Roth's penchant for oddly placed, juvenile humor. I wish someone with more talent were to tackle a story like this. It's fun to be make fun of white privilege, but I'm not so hot on this film's anti-activism message. But hey, maybe #SJW's need a cautionary tale. The best part of this film may be musician Sky Ferreira's performance, which is so legitimately awful I wished she was in every frame. GRADE: D+

HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA 2
(Genndy Tartakovsky, 2015)
I didn't really like the first film. It had it's moments, but there's so few non-horror Halloween themed films out there I figured why not watch this one. Plus, my nephew wanted to see it. While the first film focused on the residents of the titular hotel, this one continues the story of Adam Sandler's vampire character who becomes a grandfather. The largest aspect of the plot is whether or not the grandson will be a vampire or human. Of course, the teaser trailer kind of gave that away. The film has some cute gags and my nephew liked it. Overall, it's entirely forgettable and there are better kid-friendly Halloween movies. The animation is fine, noting spectacular. Selena Gomez, Andy Samberg and Mel Brooks also contribute vocal work. GRADE: C

THE BATTERY
(Jeremy Gardner, 2014)
Two baseball players roam the New England wilderness months after the zombie apocalypse breaks out in this dark comedy. Very low budget (IMDB says $7k, but I don't buy that.), but definitely not without its charms. The non-actors are good, there's some clever scenes (a zombie lady being used as spank material!) and the final act takes place entirely in the back of a car. Best of all, whereas other apocalyptic films showcase people coming together to form makeshift families, this one cleverly depicts just how rocky a relationship with the only other living person would be. Excellent use of indie music on the soundtrack, too. One of the more original zombie fare I've seen in a while, and that's always appreciated. GRADE: B+

SPRING
(Justin Benson and Aaron Moorhead, 2015)
I'll echo what other reviewers have said: this is Richard Linklater's Before Sunrise crossed with HP Lovecraft. An American, recovering from his mother's death, takes a trip to Italy where he falls for a beautiful young woman with a, uh, interesting secret. My only gripe with this is I didn't quite understand what exactly was happening to her and why she needed to do what she needed to do. It was all explained so fast, but I guess that keeps with the film's whimsical yet still dark mood. More of a fantasy/romance with some horror and sci-fi elements, this is another low budget film that actually has some solid visual effects works, probably the most impressive creature since Splice. One thing I absolutely loved about this was Lou Taylor Pucci. I'll admit despite seeing his name on numerous indie films and the Evil Dead remake, I'm not all that familiar with him. He's so effortless, charming and sexy as this character I was just absolutely smitten. That's the kind of charisma and intuition most young actors wish they had. Come on, Hollywood! Give him some great material. Nadia Hilker co-stars as the bella. GRADE: B+

UNFRIENDED
(Leo Gabriadze, 2015)
So, Modern Family did something similar to this a few weeks before it opened, which oddly may have dwindled some of the interest. Truth be told, this works better than expected. While we've had found footage films, this is a live desktop (I guess that's what I'd call it?) horror film about a group of teens being stalked a year after the suicide of a classmate. Skype, Facebook and various other modern computer programs are utilized as a way of building suspense. My big issue is that - and I should say I have no idea if this was a problem in theaters - any time someone was typing something or there was a Facebook update, I had to squint to read it. So by about halfway into it, I had a massive headache and my eyes hurt. Surprisingly, there are some decent death scenes but the film isn't entirely successful in its endeavor. I kind of laughed at how long the ending credits were given someone probably could have made this movie for a couple hundred dollars. GRADE: C+

13 EERIE
(Lowell Dead, 2013)
Forensic students venture to the remote location of an old prison for a project involving examining corpses, but end up fending off mutated former inmates. Yeah, sounds fun? I knew this wouldn't be great, but I caught some of it on Chiller one night and didn't hate what I saw so I decided to save it for Horrorfest to watch unedited. It's about what I expected: stupid yet watchable. The gore is decent and I appreciated the old fashioned makeup effects. I didn't like the inmates turned the people into zombies, though. We can keep zombies out of every horror film, people! The characterizations are wafer thin, but I found the very last scene pretty amusing. They also didn't take advantage of the setting enough, as there were only about 4-5 locations used. Katherine Isabelle, no stranger to the genre, stars. GRADE: C

Trailer: "Hail, Caesar!"

The Coen Brothers team with an all-star cast in this comedy about Hollywood's golden age coming out early next year. The best part was Channing Tatum in Gene Kelly mode, with some male dancer's ass almost in his face. Yum.

Box: With the appropriately named Pan.

1. The Martian - $31m / $104m / $180m
2. Hotel Transylvania 2 - $19m / $116m / $175m
3. Pan - $18m / $18m / $55m
4. Sicario - $7.5m / $27m / $46m
**The Intern - $7.5m / $48.5m / $65m
6. The Walk - $6.5m / $9.2m / $25m
7. The Maze Runner: The Scorch Trialsn - $4m / $69.5m / $80m
8. Black Mass - $3m / $57.5m / $65m
**Everest - $3m / $38.5m / $45m
10. The Visit - $2m / $60.5m / $65m

The Martian almost broke Gravity's October record. It and Hotel Transylvania 2 are doing spectacularly and giving this time of the year the kick it deserves. Sicario did about as expected, still very solid considering it's an adult-aimed dark thriller. The Intern is showing some great legs, and will probably finish just ahead of Black Mass. Who saw that coming? The Nancy Meyers film is really taking advantage of the lack of comedies in the marketplace. The Walk completely bombed in its IMAX only run last weekend, and probably won't do much better once it expands. Despite good reviews, it looks like we'll be seeing think pieces over the next several days about why the film is doing so poorly. (Audiences with vertigo? Audiences uncomfortable seeing the World Trade Center? Audiences uncomfortable with annoying French people?) Pan opens this weekend, and it's going to fail no matter what thanks to that massive budget. I originally thought it might steal some of Hotel Transylvania's family audience but now HT2 seems like a bigger threat to Pan than the other way around. 99 Homes expands to about 500+ locations, but it won't make the top 10. I doubt it even breaks a million.