Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Ranked: The Past 10 Oscar Ceremonies

Start with the worst.

10. The 82nd Academy Awards




Hosts: Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin
Winners: The Hurt Locker, Kathryn Bigelow, Jeff Bridges, Sandra Bullock, Christoph Waltz, Mo'nique
Notable Occurances: There are 10 Picture nominees; Bigelow is the first female directing winner; the song nominees aren't performed during the show; this is the first year that honorary Oscars are presented in a separate ceremony
Best Dressed: Sandra Bullock, Kate Winslet, Cameron Diaz
The Good: A deserving set of winners, eclectic batch of presenters, some fun fashions and a decent tribute to horror movies. Sandra Bullock's speech is one of the very best and actually made me cry. The DUDE won an Oscar. The acting winners were pretty terrific.
The Bad: The show begins with the leading acting nominees standing onstage being introduced. Not the supporting nominees? Neil Patrick Harris comes out and sings a song about not doing it alone then the hosts are lowered to the stage. Baldwin and Martin deliver a monologue that consists mostly of them pointing out people in the audience and making jokes. This more or less doesn't work, though their joke about Meryl having a large collection of Hitler memorabilia was great. Outside of a clip of them doing Paranormal Activity, this is about all the hosts contribute. The supporting nominees get "trailers" of their performances, clips set to music. Members of the Brat Pack come out and pay respect to John Hughes. There's nothing particularly wrong with this, but why Hughes when so many filmmakers and stars have passed on and merely get a small clip in the In Memoriam package? Lots of presenters and people in the audience are chewing gum. The co-producer of the show, Adam Shankman, is also a judge on "So You Think You Can Dance?" So, of course, we get dancing to the score nominees. Again, nothing particularly wrong with this, except that the dancing didn't match the scores nominated in anyway. Doing the robot to the score of Up? Really? Taylor Lautner and Kristen Stewart (who awkwardly coughs while presenting) introduce a montage of horror clips. Why Lautner and Stewart when their movie is not horror and they both look like they'd rather be elsewhere? Truth be told, I liked the montage and the whole stage going red was pretty cool. There are no original song performances, rather Amanda Seyfried and needs-to-learn-how-to-stand-up-straight Miley Cyrus present a clip package of the nominated songs. Honestly, this works better than I thought it would, but when you consider the numbers were cut in favor of break-dancing and "Don't You Forget About Me"/former teen stars who are now on bad sitcoms or fresh from rehab, it is a little angering. Throughout the show, winners in non-important categories are cut off abruptly. And I mean abruptly. Like, 30 seconds is up. The mic goes off, the music plays loud and they cut to a totally random shot in the audience. This is truly one of the most disrespectful ways of "playing the winner off" I've ever seen. That is until toward the end when the nominees for Cinematography, Sound and Editing didn't even get clips? They got the names of their movie displayed behind the presenter. AND THAT WAS FUCKING IT? Honorary Oscar recipients get introduced, but they are sitting in the audience the situation was awkwardly handled. The leading nominees get tributes to them from former costars, which leads to one of the few good things about the show: seeing Michelle Pfeiffer back on the Oscar stage. The tributes were terrible, making the nominee out to be the greatest person who ever walked the Earth. When Bigelow's historic moment comes, they play "I Am Woman" to remind us she is a woman. Or something. Best Picture is about to be announced by Tom Hanks, he doesn't even recap the nominees. He comes out with the envelope, and says "and the winner is..." and announces the winner. The most anticlimatic revealing I've ever seen at any award show. There in lies another problem: they used "and the winner is..." instead of "the Oscar goes to.." It should ALWAYS be "and the Oscar goes to..." When you dream about winning one and giving an acceptance speech, do you say "and the winner is...ME!"? No. I did love that Winslet said it, hopefully being defiant and a "fuck you" to the producers who wanted to make the show more like a reality show. They flat out said the Oscars were one of the original reality shows.
This whole show was just so poorly conceived and really offensive to those of us that love movies.

9. The 77th Academy Awards



Host: Chris Rock
Winners: Million Dollar Baby, Clint Eastwood, Jamie Foxx, Hillary Swank, Morgan Freeman, Cate Blanchett
Notable Occurances: The producers, desperate to keep the show short and get lots of young viewers, hire Rock as host, get Beyonce to sing most of the nominated songs, have several awards presented in the aisles rather than on stage, and have several categories' nominees lined up on stage to get the category finished faster.
Best Dressed: Kate Winslet, Gwyneth Paltrow, Catalina Sandino Moreno, Sandra Oh
The Good: Eternal Sunshine's Charlie Kaufman finally became an Oscar winner. Kate Winslet looked beautiful. I was drunk on Pinot Noir for Sideways during most of the show, and at one point left to go puke in the backyard, came back and watched the rest of the show with friends. I don't know why that's in the good list? I never thought Chris Rock did that bad of a job as host. He's sort of regarded as a failure now, but I thought he did well. Some of his jokes were howlers (introducing Halle Berry as "the star of Catwoman 2") but the Jude Law jokes really came back to slap him in the face. It didn't help that Sean Penn had to be a dick about it later on. It was awesome when the winner that wrote "El Otro De Lado" or whatever it was came up and sang part of his song as a dis on the producers. Jake Gyllenhaal looked really hot with his Jarhead buzzcut. Yum. Cate Blanchett wants her son to marry Martin Scorsese's daughter. Awww.
The Bad: Beyonce singing every song. She really should have said no, especially when she sang the french song. Julie Delpy later said Bey butchered it. Antonio Banderas sang another. That sort of star power really racked in the viewers, didn't it? No, okay. The nominees lined up on stage - I think it was for Costume, Documentary and maybe some others. I remember Laura Linney presented in the aisle some category. The producers really wanted short speeches and made a point of it several times over. It got to the point it felt like most winners had guns to their heads to get them off stage. No fun. Hillary Swank's "just a girl from a trailer park" was cringe-worthy. Julia Roberts wishes Marva a happy birthday.

8. The 83rd Academy Awards


Hosts: James Franco and Anne Hathaway
Winners: The King's Speech, Tom Hooper, Colin Firth, Natalie Portman, Christian Bale, Melissa Leo
Notable Occurances: The show employs scenic transitions featuring Gone With the Wind, Titanic, Lord of the Rings and Shrek among others. Kirk Douglas appears, Melissa Leo drops the F-bomb and steals his cane. Billy Crystal makes an appearance. Justin Timberlake attempts to convince us he is Banksy. The winners and hosts sing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" with a children's choir at the end.
Best Dressed: Michelle Williams, Anne Hathaway, Natalie Portman
The Good: Anne Hathaway gave it her all. She'd be a perfect cohost to someone like Hugh Jackman. Her outfits were fab, too. Especially the TUX!!!!!! The way the leading acting categories was presented is how ALL acting categories should be presented: Jeff Bridges and Sandra Bullock gave little introductions to each nominee. Jake Gyllenhaal and Amy Adams were adorable together and told us why we should care about shorts. I thought the autotuned movie music thing was pretty fun. The Melissa Leo craziness did not disappoint. Jennifer Lawrence laughing at her own clip - loved it! Annette Bening's sorta pissed slow clap for Natalie Portman's win was equally amazing. I'm also the only person that liked the ending montage set to the Firth's speech in King's Speech. Spielberg mentioning that the winner of Best Picture joins , but the losers of Best Picture join Citizen Kane, Pulp Fiction, etc. That was AWESOME. And a nice way of recognizing that the Picture winners are often the lesser films. Nicole Kidman received her third Oscar nomination.
The Bad: James Franco reflected the show and looked bored and put no effort into it. There were only about 2 dozen presenters, and most of them presented two categories. The song performances were lackluster, and only about 2 minutes long. But Gwyneth Paltrow!?!?! Not fun set pieces for them either? There wasn't really much humor in this one. When Josh Brolin and Javier Bardem came out to present, they kissed each other cutely on the mouth. They cut to something else. What year are we fucking in? They want to appeal to young people, but then they edit that shit out? WTF? The writing was really lame, the writers need to be fired. I hated that Anne got so much blame when the show sucking wasn't her fault at all. The show was also really short - only about 3 hours and 10 minutes. That's not too bad of a thing when the whole affair is just so dull. The scenic transitions were also pretty stupid and added nothing. And I'm really not a fan of this new revisionist history that says Billy Crystal's cameo was really fun and one of the only good things about the show. He was as dull and non-funny as the rest of the lot.

7. The 78th Academy Awards





Host: Jon Stewart
Winners: Crash, Ang Lee, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Reese Witherspoon, George Clooney, Rachel Weisz
Notable Occurances: Crash pulls one of the biggest upsets in Best Picture history; Robert Altman wins honorary Oscar; the majority of the major nominees are "issues" movies, low grossing and a pretty bleak lot; Ernest Borgnine said he won't see Brokeback, would rather masturbate
Best Dressed: Michelle Williams, Keira Knightley, Salma Hayek
The Good: Show's outcome aside, there was lots to like here. Jon Stewart's monologue was strong ("Ladies, Gentlemen, Felicity"), and a lot of his stuff throughout the show was great (like his running gag about how they are running out of montages/film clips - "later on, we'll be doing a montage of film montages). The actress campaign videos ("Keira Knightley - Acting While Beautiful") remain one of the funniest things ever on an Oscarcast. Ditto the montage showing just how gay westerns are. Song performances, outside of several words from "It's Hard Out Here For A Pimp" being changed, were solid. There were lots of montages, including some memorable ones about "issue" movies. I remember the scores were also performed during the show by a violinist. Nice touch. Stewart jokes that this year the presenters were in order of talent. First up: Nicole Kidman. Oh, and when Jon Stewart was coming out at the beginning, they cut to Catherine Keener texting in the audience. I don't know why that was such a fun moment, but it was. She was apparently texting Jennifer Aniston. The best part of the night may have been Meryl Streep and Lily Tomlin's wonderful, funny tribute to Robert Altman. And he finally won just months before his death.
The Bad: "...Crash." As I said prior to the show, if it won it would instantly become the most hated Best Picture winner. And it kinda did. That debacle aside, they played music over the winners. Why exactly? I'm still not sure. Apparently the people on the show couldn't hear it, it was just added for the audience at home. Some people noted that there was an awkwardness in the air of the show, something that is easier to see upon rewatch. The first winner was Clooney, who really gave one of the most smug speeches ever. Saying about how progressive Hollywood is and patting himself on the back. Yeah, the end of the show proved how progressive Hollywood is. Jake Gyllenhaal also introduced a montage of films that show the grandeur of the big screen, while Hollywood voted for a film they got a screener of. The ending of this Oscarcast really brings everything down.

6. The 75th Academy Awards




Host: Steve Martin
Winners: Chicago, Roman Polanski, Adrien Brody, Nicole Kidman, Chris Cooper, Catherine Zeta-Jones
Notable Occurances: The show went out despite a war having just started; Michael Moore gets political and is booed; 75 previous winners are seated on stage to celebrate the 75th anniversary; Eminem becomes an Oscar winner; Roman Polanski is banned from the country but wins an Oscar; there was barely a red carpet to tone things down due to world events
Best Dressed: Salma Hayek, Diane Lane (not a good fashion year, things being muted and all)
The Good: Steve Martin proved again to be a great host, delivering some great stuff like movie stars being young (Haley Joel Osment), middle aged (Natalie Portman) and old (Reese Witherspoon). He said Jack got in a hot tub with Kathy Bates, but "who hasn't?" He really brought his A-game given he really needed to make the show entertaining. The 75 winners assembled on stage was wonderful, and the show's emotional high point. Several winners mentioned wanting peace in the world, and Adrien Brody's surprise victory and Halle Berry smooch provided a touch of elation. As far as watercooler moments go, not much can top Michael Moore getting booed after a standing ovation. Barbra Streisand's face after reading Eminem as Original Song winner was one for the ages. This is probably one of the only examples of a show running around three hours and being a good thing. Oh, and Nicole Kidman won an Oscar.
The Bad: It's hard to ignore the events surrounding the show and that it almost didn't happen. Some found the whole show kind of awkward as it was clear they didn't know what tone to go with. Eminem was not there and didn't perform his winning song. I find nothing wrong with people expressing their disdain for the war and asking for peace, but it's hard dealing with Barbra Streisand doing this. Self righteous 101. Salma Hayek was the show's Russell Crowe and sat unsmiling during most of Martin's material. To make time for the 75 winners presentation, there were no acting clips. In fact, I really don't remember how any categories were presented?

5. The 79th Academy Awards



Host: Ellen Degeneres
Winners: The Departed, Martin Scorsese, Forest Whitaker, Helen Mirren, Alan Arkin, Jennifer Hudson
Notable Occurances: Martin Scrosese finally wins an Oscar; Al Gore appears; there are lots of Mexican nominees; Jennifer Hudson wins for a debut performance; Eddie Murphy leaves after losing
Best Dressed: Gwyneth Paltrow, Kate Winslet, Reese Witherspoon, Rinko Kikuchi
The Good: I remembering being really happy with this show. There were over 50 presenters. Man, Laura Ziskin knew how to get the best people to appear on the show. Well, not the best. But a diverse slate that really represented the movie industry. Pilobolus, the shadow people, were a nice addition - Snakes on a Plane and the gun firing from The Departed. I also loved that sound tribute by the people using their voices to replicate movie sounds. I think they were called Elements and Motion? Ellen was fun, if underused. I loved her interactions with Clint and Marty. Anne and Emily presenting Costume Design with models modeling the clothes was another fave. Their introduction, with Meryl glaring at them, was a high point. Meryl doesn't even say anything during this show and steals the scene. Since Ziskin was the producer of the show, the technical categories were presented wonderfully. Yes, someone actually cares about them! And of course the audience went wild when Scorsese finally won!
The Bad: The show dragged a lot. I remember reading that one point there was like 45 minutes without an award presented. Celine Dion performs, bleh. Despite my enjoyment of a lot of the show, there was still a lot that needed cut. And for the love of God, stop getting Cameron Diaz to present Animated Feature. And stop telling her to tell the animated nominees to remain in their seat. Cute, we get it. Another award show pet peeve: Emily and Anne presented a category where their film was nominated. Jack presented Best Picture which went to The Departed. Stop doing this. I get they are professionals, but it just feels awkward. I fucking hated Jerry Seinfeld doing standup during the show. He wasn't funny. More Ellen, please.

4. The 76th Academy Awards




Host: Billy Crystal
Winners: Lord of the Rings: Return of the King, Peter Jackson, Sean Penn, Charlize Theron, Tim Robbins, Renee Zellweger
Notable Occurances: LOTR pulls off a clean sweep and wins 11 Oscars, tying Titanic and Ben Hur for most wins; Bill Murray almost leaves after Sean Penn wins; Julia Roberts presents a tribute to Katherine Hepburn; Sofia Coppola is an Oscar winner like her father and cousin
Best Dressed: Angelina Jolie, Renee Zellweger, Julia Roberts, Jennifer Garner
The Good: Truth be told, I didn't care for this show when it aired. I was in no way a Ring-er, and the amount of love for it during the show repulsed me. Looking back, this may is a show I would show someone if they told me they had never seen the Oscars. Browsing through pictures, the fashions were terrific. The presenters were a nice lineup. I liked the acting winners (Go CHARLIZE!), and there was a lot of well done humor throughout the show. Jack Black and Will Ferrell sang a song about the music that plays winners off, giving us the lyrics. "You're boring! Look at Catherine Zeta-Jones, she's snoring!" I rewatched Crystal's opening and it was fun, if nothing spectacular. The absolute best thing about this show was the musical performances. They were pretty much the best we'll ever see on an Oscar show. From the funny/bittersweet A Mighty Wind duo, to the energetic Triples of Belleville number, PERFECTION! Fun red carpet moment: Nicole Kidman comes up behind Sandra Bullock as Bullock is giving an interview. Nicole taps her, says Hello, and moves on. Sandra turns to the camera and deadpans "She's stalking me!"
The Bad: I didn't see the film that won Best Picture and its hard for me to get excited about its win. It still seems like overkill, and I know I'm biased. It just takes the show down a few notches for me. And I still think Billy Crystal is ridiculously overrated.

3. The 80th Academy Awards





Host: Jon Stewart
Winners: No Country for Old Men, Joel and Ethan Coen, Daniel Day Lewis, Marion Cotillard, Javier Bardem, Tilda Swinton
Notable Occurances: The show actually goes on after a months long writers' strike ends two weeks before the ceremony; the four acting winners are not American; bleak films dominate with the exception of the sole blockbuster Juno
Best Dressed: Marion Cotillard, Jennifer Garner, Helen Mirren
The Good: Here's where having a great lineup of films and pretty much the best lineup of winners ever can crank the show up a few notches. Marion's win and speech remains probably my favorite Oscar-winning moment of the past decade. Even a very pregnant Cate Blanchett looked thrilled when she won. The last hour of the show was pretty much nothing but a drunk me screaming YES! YES! YES! like Meg Ryan in a cafe. All four winners gave lovely speeches, and the shy Coen brother was a hoot. Stewart's monologue was stronger his first time hosting, but his material throughout the show was perfection. (Cate Blanchett being the dog from No Country for Old Men, in particular, killed.) Best of all, he brought Marketa Irglova back on stage to finish her speech. Cate Blanchett reacting to her clip was also one of the best moments, Stanley Tucci and Jennifer Lawrence would later pull the same reaction during their respective years. Lastly, the red carpet produced the greatest moment in red carpet history: Ryan Seacrest is talking to Jennifer Garner, with Laura Linney behind her. Out of nowhere comes Gary Busey, plants an awkward kiss on Jennifer's neck while Laura attempts to save her. Ryan stands there awkwardly and tries to be a man and get Gary away but fails. Jennifer seems at a loss for words once Busey leaves. Ah, life is complete.
The Bad: Getting this out of the way quickly, the show was more or less put together at the last minute and felt it. Tech categories were rushed through a little too quickly. The fashions pretty much sucked. The red carpet sucked, Ryan Seacrest whiped sweat on the camera. Joey Fatone said Amy Ryan looked constipated? Really. I forgot about this stuff but went back and read my blog entry. Amy Adams also deserved a set piece for her number and Kristen Chenoweth was flat. Miley Cyrus was a presenter, though she almost fell so that made it worth it. I remember there being a slippery area and it almost brought down Colin Farrell, too. The absolute worst part of this show really had nothing to do with the show. The media the morning after mercilessly panned the show. Well, not the show. The winners. This selection of winners is, like OMG BEST EVER? But the women of The View said they didn't know who Marion was and she shouldn't have won? No Country wasn't a huge hit (boy, it really has gained a following in the years since!) so it shouldn't have won. There weren't any Americans. Tilda is weird. Blah blah blah. The reaction to the show was just awful.

2. The 74th Academy Awards





Host: Whoopi Goldberg
The Winners: A Beautiful Mind, Ron Howard, Denzel Washington, Halle Berry, Jim Broadbent, Jennifer Connelly
Notable Occurances: The first show from the Kodak Theatre; first show since 9/11 making security tight; Woody Allen appears for the first time at an Oscar show; lots of black winners and nominees; the Animated Feature category is introduced; there was a lot of behind the scenes mudslinging and dirty campaigning; Nicole Kidman gets her first Oscar nomination
Best Dressed: Halle Berry, Renee Zellweger, Reese Witherspoon
The Good: Whoopi was fun, getting some great jokes in ("In the Bedroom was shot with such a low budget, it was originally called In the Doublewide"). Her entrance from the roof, parodying Moulin Rouge!, was grand, and she got a kiss from Russell Crowe who was apparently forced at gunpoint to smile. Reese Witherspoon, with then husband Ryan Phillippe, had funny material to present. Though his off the cuff remark when she said she wanted to read the winner - "Ok, you make more than I do" - absolutely killed. The presenters were a fun batch and they also seemed to be genuinely happy to be there. Woody's surprise appearance may be one of the show's biggest ever, and he was his typical funny self. There were lots of montages, Woody introduced one about New York set films. Timely, lovely. The Cirque Du Soleil performance was breathtaking. The tech categories were presented as if they mattered, I still remember the Editing one which more or less showed us how scenes were assembled. The screenplay presentations were the first to use the presenters narrating portions of the screenplay. It has since been used a lot. Finally, Halle Berry's emotional win was, in the moment, a beautiful tear jerker and proof of how much this show does matter.
The Bad: The Berry win now seems kinda embarassing, given she seemed to believe she opened doors for every black actor in Hollywood. This show ran almost 4.5 hours. I remember it being well after 12:30 and still having a few more categories. A lot of the show lagged, and there was plenty that could have been cut. Oh, and A BEAUTIFUL MIND? JENNIFER CONNELLY??? Worst acting winner of the past decade.

And that leaves...

1. The 81st Academy Awards








Host: Hugh Jackman
Winners: Slumdog Millionaire, Danny Boyle, Sean Penn, Kate Winslet, Heath Ledger, Penelope Cruz
Notable Occurances: Heath Ledger wins a posthumous Oscar; the acting awards are presented by five previous winners in the respective category; presenters were not announced prior to the show; the show is presented in a way that shows how movies are made; a big musical number featuring host Jackman, Beyonce, Zac Efron, Vanessa Hudgeons, Amanda Seyfried and Dominic Cooper salutes the movie musical
Best Dressed: Anne Hathaway, Tina Fey, Angelina Jolie, Sarah Jessica Parker
The Good
: Perhaps the classiest and most smooth-running Oscar ceremony I've seen. Jackman's opening number, with a nice little cameo by Hathaway, was worthy of the standing ovation it received. He hit everything perfectly. There were rumors of how the acting categories would be presented, but when those five previous Oscar winning Supporting Actresses came out, it gave the evening such a special feel. It's one of the few times that Academy has acted on their history as a way of saluting the present. The supporting actress presentation was easily the best of the four, and I must admit all of the nominees - Viola Davis especially, given she was first and didn't know what was coming - looked like they were about to cry. Observe the picture above and you'll see Meryl Streep was the first to give the past winners a standing-O. Loved Whoopi's "It's not easy being a nun." to Amy. The acting presentations also gave the evening a wonderful sense of suspense given we had no clue who was coming out to pay homage to the next group. The lead actresses were fun - Sophia Loren's being impressed by Meryl's 15 nominations was gloriously campy. And whodathunk that Halle Berry talking about herself would be the perfect way to salute Melissa Leo. Anne Hathaway crying and gasping for air while Shirley Maclaine talked about her made me, well, cry and gasp for air. Robert De Niro's "How did Sean Penn play straight so well for all these years?" was playful. Steve Martin and Tina Fey presented the Screenplay categories, and were as hilarious as you expected them to be. "I'm Steve Martin." "I'm Tina Fey." "And I'm Steve Martin." Dustin Lance Black's speech telling gay youths that they are "beautiful creatures of value" was lovely. Heath Ledger's family accepting his Oscar was emotional, sweet and deserving. The big midshow musical number was fun. Ben Stiller (as Joaquin Phoenix) with Natalie Portman was another hilarious moment. The Best Picture presentation at the end, linking the five (remember when there were 5?) nominees to many of the films that came in years before, was something that should be done every year. This is one of the few ceremonies were they fully utilized the Academy's history in a thoughtful, intelligent way. Rather than just homage after homage. Over the ending credits, they played clips from upcoming films. Different, but interesting.
The Bad: While the ladies were able to sell their tributes, some people had trouble. Did Adrien Brody really have to say "who is Richard Jenkins? if you google him..."? Alan Arkin called Philip Seymour Hoffman Seymour Philip Hoffman. There were no acting clips because of the presentations, and you know I love my acting clips. I also didn't like that when Will Smith presented, he presented like 5 awards in a row. He seemed like he was co-hosting the show. As for Jackman, he kinda disappeared outside his 2 numbers. The actual nominated songs were truncated versions. And despite great acting winners, SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE??!?!?!? won 8 awards. Bleh.

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